The 'B' Word

I received the following from a professional from one of my programs:

I have been reading ‘Sell Little Red Hen Sell.’ I thought you would be interested to hear that I thought of your program last night as I was watching the Obama address to the nation. There were a number of key points addressed from the first 100 days, to the economy to Iraq. I have to say I did not take much away from the address with the exception of the amount of times Obama said ‘But’ throughout the course of his answers. Honestly I couldn’t concentrate on the content of his answers as I was too busy watching his body language and counting the ‘buts’. I have a long way to go before this word is eliminated from my vocabulary but I am progressing in monitoring responses to questions and comments on a daily basis. I thought it was funny the such an engaging public speaker, let alone someone with his power was negative without possibly even realizing.

This is a fantastic observation and this person is on the road to better communication because they are improving their level of listening. In my programs, I suggest that they completely remove the word 'but' from their vocabulary.

Here was my response:

Great job! Awareness (recognition) is a huge part of making the change.

Three items:

1. He's the CEO of the USA and CEO's have butitis, because they are there to see what is wrong and fix it. As you pointed out though, it's even more important for them to keep but out of their language.

2. Remember we talked about having the skills during times of 'stress'. This is the 'choke' factor.

If you go to youtube and see Obama's earlier speeches, he doesn't use but as much. The stress is piling up and he's over his stress line which is why he's using it more. He's falling back to 'poor' habits.

3. I make a point about getting but out of your vocabulary because it is such a nasty habit word and the best way to change is by getting rid of it completely (like being part of AA and never taking a drink).

The reality is, there are times that it can be used effectively and purposely. Use but whenever you wish to eliminate what you just said. An example Obama would use, as a democrat, is 'the republicans care about the country, but they are slowing down the progress'. In this case, the compliment is removed and the sentence actually implies the reverse.

Keep up the great work!!!!!!!

We all wish our country and our leaders success - maybe they'll see this and make a change to their language.